The Boy Who Was First!

Just a few days ago we celebrated.  We celebrated the boy who came first.


 The first time we felt the wave of emotions that flow like the tide as you discover a miracle is happening inside you- the gift of a child.  We felt so much of it during my pregnancy.  The celebration with a best friend when we both found out we were due within two days of each other. The wonder and awe that filled us as his first fluttering was felt. The fear and horror that filled our hearts as we heard words like only 30% chance of life, grapefruit sized tumor, and the worst- have you considered termination.  The absolute gratefulness that words cannot express as we heard his first cry and saw the miracle the Lord had worked in healing his little body enough to live in this world.  The fear we could not contain but with prayer as he had major surgery on Valentine's Day when he was just 13 months old.  The helplessness as he left our hands for the hands of a surgeon. The helplessness as we held him as he cried for hours as they could not get his pain contained.  But through it knowing he was held in the Greater Physician's hands.  His face at 2 years old playing peek a boo on our bed with Daddy.  Unable to contain his giggles nor could Mommy.  The memory of him at 3 years dancing in the fountains at Universal Studio's Islands of Adventure while those around him laughed with him at such expression of joy.  By four he had traveled all over the U.S. with Daddy and Mommy! 

Then life again for him changed.

In came the birth of one sister after another in quick succession.  And he became a big brother.  Conflict often with one and such patience with the other.  But love always expressed. 

He was growing into himself.  Good at just about everything he tries.  And the importance of humility and the sin of pride became things taught again and again.  Such a social creature who has more friends than the grains of sand on the beach I think at times. Yet we have to remind him that an example of righteousness is more important than causing his friends to dissolve into laughter. I watched the light on his face the day he got it with reading. The challenge in his gaze as he looks up a climbing wall and self confidently steps up. The gentleness by which he take his brother by hand or wrestles oh so carefully with his sisters and brother. The way he tilts his head as he absorbs the music he plays on the piano. Listening, internalizing its emotion, rhythm, and feel. His love of science and math and his struggle to enjoy reading. His heart for the Lord and desire to serve Him. The emotion I hear as he lifts his voice in prayer. His struggle so like his mother to prioritize. His dad's dry sense of humor, wit, and logic. We wrestle with his desire for independence already and struggle to walk the line all parents must walk between training and letting them learn through experience.

He is my first, and he holds my heart so very tight. He teaches me even as I teach him. We have had him for 10 beautiful years. And I never cease to be amazed by this blessing.

War paint on and ready for Nerf Wars!

This post more of a flow of thoughts springing forth than a true well written piece of narrative.  The images and emotions that fill my mind as I think back over the years.  And the thought that comes first, foremost, and last is "Thank you, Father, thank you. This gift is treasured.  This blessing fills my life, mind, and heart. And this gift help me give freely and fully back to you to use as you see fit."